I'm Reviewing: Underworld
Which is a: Movie
Basics: A cheesy vampire verses the lycans (a.k.a werewolves for our oh-so-illiterate readers) movie that confused me and made me want to stop watching it.
The Plot: Eh. No. I don't really know what was going on. Something about creepy uv bulletts and old wrinkly vamp and human-healer-boy and blah blah blah. I lost track of it.
Pros: Hot guys. Hot guys. Hot guys. Oh, and the girl vamp had an awesome jacket and a cool accent.
Cons: Cheesy and unintentionally campy. The effects made me occasionally grin but otherwise I wanted to crush the screen. And... well, yeah. It wasn't very good.
Conclusion: Sucky. Don't watch it unless you aren't a vampire or lycan obsessor such as I. It'll piss you off and give you the urge to go kill things... Three all the way... Just cause of the hot guys.